I didn’t take my Seroquel last night. I just didn’t feel like going to sleep, so I opted not to take it (no worries, I just took my Abilify this morning and my thinking is clear). Without the Seroquel, I slept a total of zero hours – I’m still up. I was feeling so content now that my suffering has lifted that I didn’t want to go to bed for fear that this contentment would go away, and once I awoke I would be miserable once again.

    I went out for coffee at five this morning, but Starbucks wasn’t open again. It was the second time this week that the opening baristas were late. So, I ended up driving to Caribou Coffee instead. My barista friend was working this morning, and it was nice to see her. As usual, I tried to make up some jokes to tell her, but I was drawing a blank this morning. Of course my friend thinks my jokes are incredibly stupid – usually they are puns involving a coffee theme, but I hope she appreciates the effort.

    This past evening has been a time of reflection for me. I thought about the friends I have now (though they may be few, they are wonderful and I appreciate them), as well as all the efforts I have been doing over the past few years, both with the book and with my volunteering. All in all, I think I have really made a positive influence on people’s lives. I’m not trying to be self-congratulatory, but I think sometimes we all need to step back and appreciate our efforts, especially at times when we may doubt our contributions to the world. It was a George Bailey sort of evening, minus any sort of suicidal ideation. I think I will have to watch “It’s a Wonderful Life” again sometime soon. Great movie. Later today I’m getting together to watch the movie “Rudy” with a friend. The last time we got together to watch the movie I fell asleep, and although I promised I would stay awake this time, I’m wondering if I will fall asleep again not having slept last night.    

    Coming soon: Blog entries that are more thoughtful (I promise).