The Importance of Good Medication
Tonight, or last night rather as it is now Thursday, I was thinking about where I would be in life without medication that worked well. Here are the realistic possibilities that I have come up with.
1. I would be in a mental hospital. This is a definite possibility, but as there are fewer of them around, it is not quite so likely. The reasons the large state institutions shut down was due to legislation (intending to be helpful) that mandated people with mental illness be treated in their communities. However, the money that had been going to the hospitals didn't go to new community-based treatment centers, and so due to the lack of funding community treatment has never really become a reality.
2. I would be in a defacto community-based treatment center, A.K.A. the county jail. This is a definite possibility. Much of the time county jails are even used to house patients with mental illness who have NOT committed any crime, all because there are not enough beds in the hospitals. At the jails, of course, the mentally ill are preyed upon by criminals.
3. I would be homeless. Again, another very realistic option. When I came home from college, I would have become homeless had my parents not taken me in. This is because I was so very sick at the time (paranoid and apathetic) and couldn't take care of myself. Even here in Minnesota, 47% of the homeless are mentally ill. I still worry about this option sometimes, as I don't know what will happen to me once my parents pass away. Fortunately, my mother's side of the family lives into their 80s and 90s. It is likely, due to the genetics from my father's side and also my extremely poor health, that my mother will out-live me. Parents don't like out-living their children, but in this case I think it would be desired.
4. I would be dead. This is the most likely option. I have been so suicidal over the years, and it is the miracle of good medication that has saved me by making me healthy enough to feel I still have a life worth living. Most people with schizophrenia who kill themselves will do so in the first five years (I'm not sure if this counting starts with the appearance of first symptoms or with the diagnostic label). Of those with schizophrenia, the most at risk are those individuals who were well adjusted, high achieving types. From my experience this is because the devastation and impact of the disease is felt in a more intense and greater way. I'm about four years from my diagnosis, so maybe I will be in the clear soon.
But none of these four is the reality of my life. I have found medication that completely changes everything. It amazes me that taking one pill a day that is about three millimeters in diameter is the difference between the above and my current life.
1. I would be in a mental hospital. This is a definite possibility, but as there are fewer of them around, it is not quite so likely. The reasons the large state institutions shut down was due to legislation (intending to be helpful) that mandated people with mental illness be treated in their communities. However, the money that had been going to the hospitals didn't go to new community-based treatment centers, and so due to the lack of funding community treatment has never really become a reality.
2. I would be in a defacto community-based treatment center, A.K.A. the county jail. This is a definite possibility. Much of the time county jails are even used to house patients with mental illness who have NOT committed any crime, all because there are not enough beds in the hospitals. At the jails, of course, the mentally ill are preyed upon by criminals.
3. I would be homeless. Again, another very realistic option. When I came home from college, I would have become homeless had my parents not taken me in. This is because I was so very sick at the time (paranoid and apathetic) and couldn't take care of myself. Even here in Minnesota, 47% of the homeless are mentally ill. I still worry about this option sometimes, as I don't know what will happen to me once my parents pass away. Fortunately, my mother's side of the family lives into their 80s and 90s. It is likely, due to the genetics from my father's side and also my extremely poor health, that my mother will out-live me. Parents don't like out-living their children, but in this case I think it would be desired.
4. I would be dead. This is the most likely option. I have been so suicidal over the years, and it is the miracle of good medication that has saved me by making me healthy enough to feel I still have a life worth living. Most people with schizophrenia who kill themselves will do so in the first five years (I'm not sure if this counting starts with the appearance of first symptoms or with the diagnostic label). Of those with schizophrenia, the most at risk are those individuals who were well adjusted, high achieving types. From my experience this is because the devastation and impact of the disease is felt in a more intense and greater way. I'm about four years from my diagnosis, so maybe I will be in the clear soon.
But none of these four is the reality of my life. I have found medication that completely changes everything. It amazes me that taking one pill a day that is about three millimeters in diameter is the difference between the above and my current life.
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